Are you trying to drop some pounds? You might want to reconsider after hearing this list of The Top Reasons Trying to Lose Weight Is Stupid.
- It puts people at the Little Debbie factory out of work. During a pandemic, no less.
- What’s the point of a mouth if you only use it to sip water?
- If you stay chubby, you’ll never be the one they send crawling through the air ventilation system to go get help.
- Losing weight means you’ll have fewer fat folds to store Hershey bars.
- It doesn’t matter how many chins you have since nowadays they’re always covered up in public by a mask.
- You’ve always felt having two feet is one too many.
- It includes counting calories . . . and math is for NERDS!
- Making less of you is self-hatred.
- You’re married.