Signs the Holidays Have Started

Most Americans know it’s the holidays when they hear Christmas music on the radio.  But there are plenty of other indicators it’s Christmastime, too, as you’ll see with today’s list of Signs the Holidays Have Started.

  • Unkempt alcoholics are now working as Mall Santas.
  • The Hallmark Channel is in month four of showing Christmas movies.
  • People are using Walmart bathrooms to make pumpkin spice meth.
  • Your two-year-old texted you his Christmas list.
  • Pete Davidson went Instagram official with Mrs. Claus.
  • Neighbors no longer complain about the Christmas lights you never took down.
  • That annoying lady on your street put antlers on her minivan.
  • Elon Musk started firing elves.