Prizes That Should Be in the Happy Meal for Adults

McDonald’s introduced Happy Meals for adults.  They’re like the ones for kids, but the prizes reflect the mundane nothingness that life becomes once reality erodes your soul.  Like anything on today’s list of Prizes That Should Be in the Happy Meal for Adults.

  • A lighter.
  • That strap you put on glasses so they hang around your neck.
  • A tire gauge.
  • Something that opens bottles AND functions as a key chain.
  • A travel toothbrush.
  • Stamps.
  • Tweezers.
  • Anything by John Grisham.
  • Ibuprofen.
  • Strategic investment advice for navigating a financial downturn.