Top 5 Ways to Tell a Cop Isn’t Really a Cop

Some drunk fool in Colorado stole a cop car . . . and then actually responded to a call.  Fortunately, people knew something didn’t smell right (other than his breath) thanks to today’s list of Top Ways to Tell a Cop Isn’t Really a Cop.

  • His mustache only takes up half of his face.
  • Her car has sirens.  But she makes the “woo-woo” sound herself.
  • When you offer him a donut, he says “No way.  Too many carbs.”
  • He takes off his clothes at bachelorette parties.
  • The side of her car says “To Protect and to Perve.”
  • You can actually see his eyes through his sunglasses.
  • His catchphrase is “Go ahead, make my risotto.”