Things We Envy about Dogs

A survey finds that 45% of dog owners say their dog is in better shape than they are.  What else fills us with pooch envy?  Turns out there’s a lot, as you’ll see with today’s list of Things We Envy about Dogs.

  • When we hump a pillow, it just makes everyone else at the party squirm uncomfortably.
  • Have you seen how quickly dogs bounce back from puking?
  • We’d never have to miss a band at Coachella if we could just go in the middle of a field.
  • Unlike dogs, we can’t just say “I’m territorial” to excuse biting the mailman.
  • When’s the last time a stylist offered to express our anal glands?  Exactly.
  • Dogs who roll over for belly rubs from strangers are “adorable.”  People who do it are “pervs at the park.”