Signs Your Kid Is Coddled

A poll finds that the most popular way parents get their kids to eat vegetables is by bribing them.  Which raises the question:  What happened to just TELLING them to eat their veggies? So, add “You bribe them to eat peas” to today’s list of Signs Your Kid Is Coddled.

  • When you tell her to use her words, she says, “NOW, DAMMIT!”
  • His puppy has a puppy.
  • You put your chemotherapy on hold to buy her a new iPad.
  • You have a one-car garage.  And you use it for his Big Wheel.
  • The last time you told her to do a chore she called Child Protective Services.
  • You’re still breastfeeding.  And he’s 25.
  • You watch so much “PAW Patrol” you not only know the name of every member, you also know the police dog’s badge number.
  • The only time you ever told him “No” was when he asked if you were worthy enough to be his parent.
  • Whenever it looks like you’re about to win at “Candyland,” you fake a heart attack.
  • She sends YOU to time-out.
  • He thinks it’s okay to slap comedians.