Signs You Bought Her a Bad Valentine’s Day Gift

  • It’s a box of a dozen chocolates.  But before you bought it, it contained two dozen chocolates.
  • When you squeeze, push or sit on it, it emits a fart sound.
  • Instead of a bottle that says “Chanel,” the fragrance comes in a can that says “Right Guard.”
  • It’s two tickets to see “Hamilton” . . . GEORGE Hamilton.
  • You got a great deal on it because it was used.
  • It comes with a card that includes the phrase “. . . of-the-month-club.”
  • All your idiot single friends think it’s a GREAT Valentine’s Day gift.