1. Acknowledge your emotional pain-it cannot be willed away. Just as you can force a stoic look on your face when punched in the gut, you can make yourself appear unphased by an emotional blow. But superficial appearances do not change the fact that you feel pain.
2. Stop pushing your pain away and accept it. It’s understandable that you don’t want to be upset, but denying it will prevent you from seeing the thorn in your heart. You will have a sense that something is wrong, but you won’t understand what you are feeling.
3. Get to know what is upsetting you because you can only heal what you can truly see. The less you know about your unhappiness, the less you will be able to heal it.
4. Nurture empathy and compassion for yourself. As you get to know yourself, it is essential that you do it from an understanding and caring perspective-looking upon yourself the way you might do with a good friend or even a child. This way of relating to yourself is called compassionate self-awareness.