Most Popular Holiday Traditions

Americans say being with family is the best part of the holidays.  Which, of course, is a lie.  But there are traditions people really do cherish right now, as you’ll see with today’s list of the Most Popular Holiday Traditions.

  • Slamming the door on carolers.
  • Using a pellet gun to deflate the neighbor’s yard Santa.
  • Spiking grandpa’s eggnog then asking what he really thinks of women in the workplace.
  • Putting those fake antlers on our cars that amuse nobody.
  • That look on our kid’s face when they unwrap a giant box to find a pair of socks.
  • Getting hammered at the office party and peeing on the boss’ desk.
  • Making a gingerbread house.  Then raising the rent so the gingerbread family has to move into their gingerbread van.
  • Watching the rest of the street put up the same Christmas lights we had on our house all year.