Good Things to Come from the Pandemic

A report finds that tipping 20% is the new norm thanks to COVID.  For more positive trends to emerge from an otherwise negative last two years, check out today’s list of Good Things to Come from the Pandemic.

  • Feeling crowded at the movie theater?  Just cough and watch folks scatter!
  • Thanks to “Ivermectin,” your future baby will have a kick-ass name.
  • If you get lost hiking, rescuers can track your microchip.  Thanks, vaccine!
  • Coworkers on Zoom have no clue what’s in your mug.
  • “I’m concerned about the Omicron variant” sounds nicer than “The thought of spending Christmas with you fills me with soul-crushing dread.”
  • From now on, you will only eat bats from reputable wet markets.
  • Who cares if you just farted in the middle of the drugstore?  You’re in a mask!