Olympic Sports I’d Like to See Added

Ratings for the first weekend of the Tokyo Olympics were down–way down.  That could be reversed if they included sports in which people like me are interested.  Here are The Top Olympic Sports I’d Like to See Added.


  • Rowing, but with one guy purposely going in the opposite direction the whole time.
  • Jeff Bezos Tossing.
  • Team Virtue-Signaling.
  • Synchronized Snot Rocketing.
  • 100-meter Breakthrough Infecting.
  • Socially Distant Greco-Roman Wrestling.
  • Freestyle Tweaking.
  • Cross-country Karening.
  • Non-Stoned Surfing.
  • Fitted-Sheet Folding.
  • Rhythmic Vaccine Denying.