In honor of today being Cinco de Mayo, please enjoy this list of The Top Cinco de Mayo Fun “Facts”.
- Regular margaritas love to body shame skinny margaritas.
- It’s just an excuse to day-drink. Sorry. That’s a Top Fun Fact About Marriage.
- About 70% of Americans plan to celebrate it . . . while approximately zero percent of those Americans plan to learn about it.
- Quoting Cheech & Chong movies does not count as “appreciating Mexican culture.”
- Despite its cultural significance, it’s mostly celebrated by drunk white girls.
- 40% of Americans wrongly believe Cinco de Mayo marks Mexican Independence Day. And 100% are currently too drunk to give a crap.
- Restaurant servers sure are grateful to be back at work and serving you endless chips and salsa all night for your lame $1 tip.