The Top Worst Things About Being a Billionaire During the Pandemic

 The pandemic has been hard on everyone . . . even the filthy rich.  Here are The Top Worst Things About Being a Billionaire During the Pandemic.


  • Hey, YOU try finding a mask that matches your ascot!
  • The Grubhub guy can’t ever break a million-dollar bill.
  • Inviting women to your private island is a gamble when you can only see the top half of their face.
  • Your facemask won’t stay up because the decorative diamonds are just too heavy.
  • You have to keep your yachts six feet apart.
  • The doctor says poor people tears aren’t a sufficient hand sanitizer.
  • When everyone’s face is covered, you can’t tell the helicopter pilot from the food taster.
  • Rolling in money has become even LESS sanitary.
  • It’s impossible to find a masseuse willing to work on your submarine.
  • Dom Perignon doesn’t make hand sanitizer.
  • Having to bribe a senator using Zoom.
  • People keep trying to break into your vault full of toilet paper.
  • Getting a vaccine means standing in line with commoners.  Ewww!