Reasons to Dislike Fall


Today is the first day of my favorite season: Autumn.  But note everyone likes this time of year…Here are some of the reasons that some people dislike the fall:   


  • Earlier dusk means that even when you can convince your kids to go outside, they’re gonna spend even less time out there.
  • You already deal with a chill thanks to your marriage.
  • The fireplace requires wood, and that requires work.
  • No more days at the beach showing off your dad bod in your camo Speedo.
  • Every retail store decides that we need to hear the “Monster Mash” six times per visit.
  • We’re more likely to be depressed . . . when we realize the only appropriate Halloween costume for us is some character Danny DeVito played.
  • Shrinkage.  Am I right, guys?
  • The same reason spring and summer sucked: It’s 2020.