Reasons You Haven’t Made It as an Actor

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson was just named the highest-earning actor for 2019.  But the majority of actors will never come close to his level.  Find out why from this list of The Top Reasons You Haven’t Made It as an Actor.


  • It’s hard to schedule auditions around your GrubHub drop-offs.
  • You know it’s more important to be famous on TikTok.
  • They call you “The Rock” . . . but that has more to do with your being a coke dealer.
  • You didn’t even get a callback when you auditioned for “Cats”.
  • You’re a woman older than 20.
  • You’re basically Rob Schneider, but without an Adam Sandler.
  • You forgot to take off your Starbucks apron before posing for your headshots.
  • You’re represented by an agent . . . a real estate agent.
  • No one’s willing to make a James Bond movie where he has a beer belly.
  • Four words:  Football-sized neck goiter.
  • You have no idea how to wait tables.