Signs Your Neighbor Is a Drug Dealer

Are drugs easily accessible in your neighborhood?  If so, it might be because of one of your neighbors.  Here are The Top Signs Your Neighbor Is a Drug Dealer.



  • He has a bumper sticker that says, “My Kid Sells Adderall to Your Honor Student.”
  • He has that thing parked in his driveway that every drug dealer has.  What’s it called?  Oh, yeah:  Charlie Sheen.
  • He actually knows the metric system.
  • Her yard has a white picket tripwire.
  • He gets visits from strangers in the middle of the night who aren’t even hot.
  • Even before the pandemic, she worked from home in her pajamas.
  • Before returning your lawnmower, he spends three hours wiping off the fingerprints.
  • Whenever your kid goes over to play with his kid, he gets frisked.
  • He once showed you his classic collection of beepers.
  • There’s a line outside her door whenever Phish is in town.
  • His housewarming gift to you was one of his tiger cubs.
  • You buy tons of drugs from him.