Things You Shouldn’t Do with Your $1,200 Stimulus Check

Will you be getting a stimulus check from the government?  If you’re expecting one, try to use it wisely and avoid doing anything you’ll find on this list of The Top Things You Shouldn’t Do with Your $1,200 Stimulus Check.


  • Give it to your wife and kids.  They’ll just spend it on nonsense like food and water.
  • Bet on Dr. Anthony Fauci having a job much longer.
  • Purchase ANYTHING Tiger-related.  It’s not gonna last, people.
  • Order $20 worth of pizza . . . leave a $1,180 tip.
  • Buy that build-your-own-ventilator kit you found online.
  • Plan a vacation to Wuhan!
  • Go to the gas station and fill all your Tupperware with regular unleaded while it’s still cheap.
  • Hookers and blow.  Show some restraint and limit yourself to hookers OR blow.