If you encounter a police officer, you should be polite and respectful . . . and probably avoid uttering anything like you’ll hear on this list of The Top Things You Shouldn’t Say to a Cop.
- Of course I know why you pulled me over. You’re a former high school jock trying desperately to hold onto childish feelings of power and authority indefinitely.
- If by exceeding the “speed” limit you meant “meth” . . . yes I have.
- Where are the rest of the Village People?
- Hey, that looks just like the badge I got with my Cracker Jacks!
- Freddie Mercury called. He wants his mustache back.
- Will you tell your dog to stop barking? It’s ruining my buzz.
- So can I get a body cavity search without being arrested, please?
- Oh that was a pedestrian? Sorry, thought it was a speed bump.
- Are you a Starsky, or are you more of a Hutch?
- I always wanted to be a cop. But, I decided to finish high school.
- A gun? A nightstick? Looks like SOMEONE’S overcompensating.
- I’ll trade you a dozen crullers for whatever drugs you’ve confiscated.
- Since I pay your salary, how about this: You’re fired!
- This isn’t one of those stripper-grams, is it?
- Whoa! I thought you guys had to be in shape?!?