Things You Don’t Want to Hear from a Kid Selling Girl Scout Cookies

It’s officially Girl Scout Cookies Season! You can now start purchasing all your favorite cookies from your favorite Girl Scouts, but you may notice a few new things, including new packaging and a whole new cookie called Lemon-Ups!


  • I actually ran out, so I’m just selling Oreos at a huge markup
  • Now with CBD!
  • One box? Gee, now my nana can get that operation
  • After this transaction is complete, would you mind taking a brief customer service survey?
  • It’s the least you can do after leaving my generation to deal with global warming
  • Can I interest you in a Girl-Scout-Cookies Prime membership?
  • If we sell enough boxes, the troop gets to go to Burning Man
  • Spend over $50 and get free shipping!