Things That Will Get You Kicked Out of a New Year’s Eve Party


  • Starting the countdown at 10:15
  • Dressing as the New Year’s Baby and taking full advantage of wearing a diaper
  • Two words: Indoor fireworks
  • Two more words: Targeted vomiting
  • Insisting your fellow party guests help you dig up Dick Clark
  • Clog dancing
  • Trying to blow a noisemaker. . . with your butt
  • Starting a fire—even a small one
  • Defending Cats