Top Santa Tweets

Even though Santa is busy getting ready for his big Christmas Eve trek . . . he’s found some time for Twitter.  Here are The Top Santa Tweets.

  • @DavidLetterman:  I’m not feeling it this year.  Wanna switch places?

  • Hey @EasterBunnyOfficial, how’s the egg-laying going?  My elves are making Xboxes.  Don’t hate the playa.

  • @PrinceAndrew:  Your request for my list of “naughty” girls is denied.

  • Millennials, please don’t leave me a glass of oat milk and avocado toast.

  • Will I get blowback for getting Mrs. Claus a Peloton?

  • Rudolph with your nose so bright, won’t you help find my cell phone?  I think it’s in the yard somewhere.  Damn white iPhone case!

  • FYI, I got nothin’ to do with that Elf on a Shelf.  You’re being scammed, people!

  • The only thing colder than the North Pole is Greta Thunberg’s stare.

  • Call me crazy, but have you noticed these Hallmark Channel Christmas movies are all the same?

  • Remember the reason for the season . . . corporate greed.

  • Hey Prancer and Vixen: it’s the holidays!  Stop arguing about impeachment!

  • Another year of frostbite and reindeer ticks.  Time to update the resume.

  • I never have any trouble with my reindeer.  Mostly due to me prominently displaying venison cookbooks on my desk.