Fascinating “Facts” About Chocolate

It’s National Chocolate Day, so please enjoy this list of The Top Fascinating “Facts” About Chocolate.

  • The Poop Emoji has forever ruined the idea of putting eyes on Hershey’s Kisses.

  • If eating a Snickers makes you a better person, you don’t need a Snickers . . . you need therapy.

  • The cereal industry has tirelessly covered up the gruesome murders committed by Count Chocula.

  • 70% of cocoa beans come from West Africa, so it’s surprising we haven’t invaded them yet.

  • Chocolate pairs well with a rich Merlot.  It also pairs well with clinical depression.

  • People pay attention to those little squares on a Hershey bar about as much as they do yield signs.

  • If it’s not in the Halloween candy you’re giving out on Thursday, prepare to be egged.

  • Ben Franklin sold chocolate in his print shop.  When he wasn’t banging hookers.

  • People who tell you they like to mix M&M’s with movie theater popcorn say it as if they just invented gravity.

  •  It’s part of a heart-healthy diet.  According to researchers at Hershey’s.

  • Dark chocolate was invented to weed out the evil people.

  • The group of people who love chocolate the most?  Dentists.