Things to Consider Before Adopting a Dog

Are you thinking about adopting a dog?  If so, you should first take a minute to review this list of The Top Things to Consider Before Adopting a Dog.

  • Can I also find a lasagna-loving cat to delightfully torment the dog? 

  • Am I doing this just to have a fall guy for my flatulence issues?

  • Will it engage in hilarious antics, like Marmaduke?

  • Can I train it not to go nuts on the TV when Drew Carey does his “snip your dog’s nads” reminder?

  • Will I be able to tolerate the overwhelming odor of weed being constantly smoked?  Sorry, that’s something to consider before adopting Snoop Dogg.

  • Do I need to get one of those stupid “Who Rescued Who?” bumper stickers?

  • Will there be a lot of judgment if I call it my life partner?

  • Does the dog have all his shots . . . or was it owned by anti-vaxxers?

  • Will I be supportive if the dog ever asks to meet its real parents?

  • Should I take baby steps and adopt a highway first?