Ways to Make the MLB All-Star Game More Exciting

  • Try to find some way to make it about football

  • Three words: Women’s soccer players!

  • Find some way to reanimate corpse of Babe Ruth

  • Both rosters have to include at least 3 strippers

  • Open bullpen doors, release hungry coyotes

  • Infielders can now tackle baserunners

  • Strike zone extended to include batter’s entire body

  • Let the mascots play!

  • Runner is not “out” unless they’re actually unconscious

  • Replace pitchers’ mound with termite mound

  • Play down the whole connection to baseball