Possibly True “Facts” About Earthquakes

With the recent earthquakes in California in the news, it’s a good time to check out this list of The Top Interesting “Facts” About Earthquakes.

  • They’re God’s way of saying, “I hate California, too!”

  • As dangerous as they are, they’re also a great opportunity to watch women jiggle.

  • They’re the reason you never want to visit Los Angeles.  Sorry.  That’s a top interesting fact about the Kardashians.

  • Anything above a 4.0 will make you wet your pants.  Unless you’re old.  Then anything in general makes you wet your pants.

  • They’re the only thing that makes LeBron rethink leaving Cleveland.

  • The Japanese once believed earthquakes were caused by a giant catfish.  Now millions of Americans believe they happen because God hates gay people.

  • If you’re caught in one, you should not use an elevator . . . especially if you haven’t gotten your 10,000 steps in yet.

  • Democratic presidential candidate Marianne Williamson says you can stop them with just the right amount of incense.

  • Due to the movement of the San Andreas Fault, Los Angeles and San Francisco will be next to each other in 15 million years . . . creating one huge city where no one will be able to afford a house.

  • Cats can sense an earthquake is coming, but they never warn us because they don’t care if we get hurt.

  • Nothing can stop one.  Except Chuck Norris