Signs Your Favorite Major League Team is Gonna Suck

The 2019 Major League Baseball season is under way.  However, that’s not good news for all fans.  Here are The Top Signs Your Favorite Major League Team is Gonna Suck.

  • Their version of “Bat Day” is to go through the crowd and find people who can actually bat.

  • They only get runs after eating Indian food.

  • The catcher wears a mask . . . a gimp mask.

  • Whenever the camera shows their dugout, the players are all watching “The Real Housewives”.

  • Half the team was in Triple A last year . . . and the other half was in AA.

  • Their “reliever” is a guy who pees on the mound.

  • Most of the players run very slowly due to their electronic ankle bracelets.

  • Their star pitcher has trouble taking the mound because he’s afraid of heights.

  • The only thing they lead the league in is being thrown out at first from left field.

  • When they give the paid attendance for home games, it means everyone in attendance was paid.

  • They boast about not having a single player on steroids.

  • None of their pitchers escaped from Cuba on a raft.

  • They stand for the national anthem, but kneel for the entire game.

  • Their catcher has to be helped up at the end of every inning.

  • They don’t have a seventh-inning stretch, because all the fans have left by then.

  • Their name rhymes with “Altimore Borioles.”