The Best Things About Being Single.

Since today is Singles Awareness Day, it’s a good time to check out this list of The Top Best Things About Being Single.

  • The toilet paper roll goes on how YOU like it.  Always.

  • You don’t have to deal with any passive-aggressive garbage . . . unless you own a cat.

  • You can wear whatever you want without being judged.  Unless it’s a fedora.  Then you look like an idiot.

  • The “chill” in “Netflix and chill” LITERALLY means “chill.”

  • Having your soul crushed at work is enough.

  • There’s actually room on the bed for the dog to sleep.

  • A medium popcorn at the movies lasts past the first preview.

  • One Thanksgiving, one Christmas, and one Easter is more than enough, thank you very much.

  • Those department store mannequins arranged around your dining room table don’t ask annoying questions about your day.

  • You can actually get dressed and leave the house without feeling like you have to ask, “Does this match?”

  • It makes you a hugely successful singer-songwriter.  Right, Taylor Swift?

  • You’re a popular yellow processed cheese.  Sorry, that’s the best thing about being a KRAFT single.