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Bow and arrow almost impossible to get through airport security
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No residuals despite having his image on millions of greeting cards
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Hard to get rid of baby fat when holiday is so associated with chocolate!
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I can’t get dinner reservations on February 14th either
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Whenever an arrow goes astray and hits the dog, he starts humping your leg
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That little Vienna sausage they give me for a wiener!
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Getting blamed for every damn STD outbreak
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Wings are really more decorative than functional
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Needs a diaper change desperately