Things You Don’t Want to Hear the Morning after Your Office Christmas Party

 

  • The cops have your car

  • You’re in the hospital-don’t try to move

  • They want a DNA sample from you

  • You were the last one to see them alive

  • Turns out the security cameras caught everything

  • You did some things I didn’t think were physically possible

  • Your computer is locked… HR will tell you why

  • There’s a local news crew outside asking about you

  • Wow, you must be sore!

  • They had to hire crime scene cleaners because of you

  • In a sick kind of way, I almost admire you

  • Whoa, you still work here!?