Does your partner annoy you? When you spend a significant amount of time with someone, he or she is bound to become annoying. But we’re talking much more than leaving socks on the floor. If the things that your partner does in their day-to-day life-in their fundamental existence-annoy you to the point where you can’t look past it, that’s something to pay attention to.
How much of your relationship is affected by resentment? Every couple fights. Or, at least, the healthy ones do. But if you’re finding your arguments are fueled by resentment-for example, if past problems creep up into every discussion and the issues are impossible to move past-that is a signal to a larger problem.
Would you rather do things by yourself? If you start wishing that you were having all of your adventures without your partner, that’s not the best sign. At the end of the day, a relationship is a choice. You choose to be with the person you’re in a relationship with. And if you’d rather not choose them anymore, you have to start thinking about why.
What is your outlook on the future? When you take a step back and evaluate the bigger picture, do you think of your future with that person? And if so, does it fill you with dread or delight?
Do you still want to try? Just because you answered ‘yes’ to any or all of these, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s time to call it quits. The question then becomes: Do you want to still keep trying? Every relationship ebbs and flows. There are going to be rough patches; that’s part of sharing a life with another human. But if, at the end of the day, you being without this person makes you even sadder than being with them at the moment, that is worth noting. There are still ways to sort it out.