Things You Don’t Want To Hear At A Parent-Teacher Conference

Many schools have started to hold parent-teacher conferences. As a parent, you hope to get a glowing report about your kid, and nothing that’s found on this list of The Top Things You Don’t Want to Hear at a Parent-Teacher Conference.

  • We’re not even a month in and we’ve already had 7 #MeToo complaints about him.
  • I caught your son with weed. MY weed.
  • Here’s a picture he drew of himself murdering you.
  • If I were you I’d start interviewing therapists.
  • Looks like the apple doesn’t fall far from the idiot tree.
  • Your kid’s eating paste at at 7th grade level.
  • My relationship with my students has been the basis of several Lifetime TV movies!
  • Your son shows all the signs of being very successful . . . at dealing drugs.
  • Can we do our conference in about three hours? I really need to sleep off this hangover.
  • Would it be a conflict of interest to let me crash on your couch?
  • If you think about it, the South didn’t lose the Civil War.
  • Hey, the world needs ditch diggers, too.