Signs You’d Make a Bad James Bond

Idris Elba took to Twitter Sunday to weigh in on revived rumors that he could be the next actor to play secret agent James Bond.  My name’s Elba, Idris Elba,” he captioned a selfie, referencing the character’s signature introduction, “Bond, James Bond.” As the tweet made headlines, he returned to his feed and posted, “Don’t believe the HYPE…”

 Daniel Craig is set to appear in the as-yet-untitled, 25th Bond picture, which is due in theaters in late 2019. Craig, 50, previously played the globe-trotting hero in Casino RoyaleQuantum of SolaceSkyfall and Spectre. His successor has not been named yet. Elba, 45, is best known for his work on the television dramas Luther and The Wire. ‘

Sorry to have to tell you break it to you, but no matter who they choose to be the next 007, it won’t be you…but you really should have seen that coming.

  • Your last callback was for “AARP Spokesman”

  • The only phrase you know in English is “Sorry, I don’t speak English”

  • You get winded going up stairs

  • You’re not shaving the lumberjack beard!

  • The agency sent you to audition for Miss Moneypenny

  • Forget martinis-you only drink appletinis

  • You shop for clothes at the store for “husky” guys

  • You’re not even eligible for parole until 2023

  • You had to Google “James Bond”

  • People say you don’t look a day over 70

  • You’re Timothy Dalton