Hint at sex long before you have it. While spontaneity is often praised, creating sexual tension before you hit the bedroom can make for a more exciting encounter. Hours of anticipation will pay off. Give your partner a lingering kiss in the morning, a flirtatious text during the day or a wink when they walk in the door.
Consider the details. Thoughtful touches to your environment help set the mood. Maybe it’s a favorite playlist, dimmer lighting, candles or scents, all of which can enhance the experience.
Stimulate your brain. For women especially, sex begins in the mind. The brain is a more powerful sexual organ than genitalia because it’s where sex drive stems from, so reading erotica or visually imagining sex play will do wonders to heighten senses in preparation for sex.
Do one thing that makes you feel sexier. Feeling sexy and desirable to our partner is a key component that contributes to sexual enjoyment. So before sex, do something that makes you feel a little sexier and confident. Maybe that’s having a shower, wearing some underwear you feel confident in or listening to a sensual song. Something that makes you feel more attractive will put you in a more sexual headspace.
Take a few deep breaths. We’re seeing more evidence that mindfulness can help increase our attention and focus on pleasurable sexual sensations, which of course leads to better, more satisfying sex. Even if you don’t meditate, you can easily separate your sexual experience from your daily routine. Before shifting from your busy life to a sexual environment, take a moment to inhale and exhale a few deep breaths. This will help you relax and get in a more Zen headspace for sex.