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Kids, you’re getting another new Dad!
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Where is Mommy’s flask of medicine?
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Damn you kids and your stupid avocado toast
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I didn’t get you a gift, but I’ll steal some sugar packets for you
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All your ex-husbands promised to drop by
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You were an accident, and not a pretty one at that
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Mom, if you put in $20, I think we’re square
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Let’s talk about politics
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Nice cleavage, Mom