1. You feel comfortable in your routine, but not excited about it. Having a go-to person to chill with on a Friday night has its pluses, for sure. But it’s also a convenient comfort to keep you from acknowledging how you really feel about a person.
2. You just don’t want to be the single friend. Do you value authenticity over not being alone? It’s the kind of question that can make you defensive, but it’s worth digging deeper – how much of this relationship is you not wanting to be the odd girl out?
3. You keep thinking about how great his friends and family is as a reason to stay. If he’s an objectively great guy, chances are his friends and family is too. People usually choose sides in a breakup, which means, yes, you might not do kayak trips with his cool friends or feel comfortable texting his amazing mom anymore. But staying with someone for their social circle never lasts.
4. You’re convinced dumping him would make you a bad or selfish person. Ending a relationship your friends admired or your parents strongly approved of can make you think you’ll be perceived as the villain. But there’s one very important thing to remember: Your friends and family don’t have to sleep with him or spend a lifetime in an unfulfilling relationship.
5. You’re more worried about hurting him than being happy. Causing distress and heartbreak in a guy who’s been there for you and is one of the nicest people you know feels legitimately cruel. Bit it is infinitely kinder and better to break up before you spend years together. Because one way or another, you will leave.