Signs the President Is Sleeping with a Porn Star

 

  • He’s always making “official” trips to Van Nuys

  • Mirrors on the Lincoln Bedroom ceiling? Check.

  • He’s not even bothering to hit on the interns

  • Always seems to be humming Barry White songs

  • White House security has been told to admit anyone wearing 6-inch stilettos

  • He can’t stop tweeting about it

  • There’s a certain porn star who’s been wearing a lot of MAGA swag

  • His hair isn’t quite as securely plastered down

  • Three words: Carefully worded statement

  • Robert Mueller’s looking into it

  • He insists he’s not sleeping with a porn star