Signs Your Movie Isn’t Going to Be Nominated for an Oscar

  • Four words: “A Harvey Weinstein Production”
  • Opening night was a Tuesday afternoon
  • You couldn’t sit through it – and you’re the director
  • It premiered on The Weather Channel
  • Friends who saw it asked for their Go Fund Me money back
  • You can’t figure out how to download it from your phone
  • It went “viral”. . . in the sense that it made a lot of people very sick
  • A court deemed it “revenge porn”
  • None of the people in the movie were aware they were being filmed