When You See an Ex after a Breakup, Here’s How to Stay Calm

1. Have A Game Plan. Having a rough game plan is a great way to build some confidence should you run into your ex. While you can’t guarantee how they’ll behave, you can plan in advance how you want to react.

 2. When The Panic Rises, Take Deep, Steady Breaths. There may be a moment where your nerves get the best of you, particularly if the breakup is fresh, it’s the first time you’re seeing them, or they are with someone new. In these moments, it’s important to go back to basics; take deep, calming breaths.

 3. Keep It Light, Breezy, And Positive. There may be a part of you that wants to do something bonkers, like, say, rehashing the past and demanding closure. Bad plan. To avoid spiraling, avoid the emotional landmines by keeping it light and breezy.

 4. When Possible, Enlist the Aid of a Wingwoman. Pick someone who knows how to steady your nerves, boost your confidence, and, if needed, have your back by saying all the things you’re too cool, confident, and over all of it to say yourself. Ahem.

 5. Resist the Urge to Get Wasted at All Costs. Nothing says, “I’m freaking out because I am so not over you,” like being a sloppy mess. Don’t give them the satisfaction.

 6. Have An Exit Strategy. Last, but definitely not least, plan your exit strategy ahead. Just as important as the plan to play it cool at first is the plan to extricate yourself from the situation with ease. Knowing how you will get out of the conversation ahead of time gives you power.

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