Things Only Proudly Gross Couples Do

Pop each other’s back zits. And feeling enormously, sickly satisfied when you do.

 Brush away each other’s morning eye crusties or dangly boogers. You know by now that trying to guide them to the right eye or the right nostril is futile. You got this.

 Ignore your morning breaths to make out anyway. The bathroom is two feet away, but you just need to kiss NOW, stale mouth and all. It’s actually really romantic.

 Wear the same shirts around each other for days. Sometimes, a Netflix marathon in bed just takes priority over bathing or changing out of your boyfriend’s oversized tee.

 Smell each other’s armpits to see how bad they really stink. Every person deserves their own sweat smell wingman. Wouldn’t you want someone to tell you?

 Congratulate each other on very good farts or burps. #Tbt to the days you desperately held them in as if an uninterrupted, four-second fart isn’t impressive.