Signs You Have An Obese Kid

September is Childhood Obesity Awareness Month. Here are The Top Signs You Have an Obese Kid.

  • You drop her off at school on a forklift.
  • You never have to ask, “Who ate all the ham?”
  • His tennis shoes light up thanks to sparks caused by the friction of his weight on concrete.
  • His favorite breakfast cereals are Trix, Lucky Charms, and Hamburger Helper.
  • He fondly recalls his fourth birthday. Partially because he got a remote control car. But mostly because that was the last time he saw his toes.
  • He plays “Words with Obese Friends”.
  • Packing her lunch is simple: Take a thermos. Fill it with insulin. Done!
  • You would far prefer finding a joint in your kid’s pocket to finding another Twinkie.
  • She loves to play with Legos. Sorry. Eggos. She loves to play with Eggos.
  • His class voted him as the “student most likely to lose a foot.”
  • When the kids play wall ball, he’s the wall.
  • Your toddler already has a palate for diverse cheeses.
  • He’s stuck in second grade. Literally. He’s jammed into his desk so tightly that teachers keep failing him.
  • His school picture had to be taken by Google Earth.
  • Duh, he’s American.