What is the potential cost?
The first things you should think about are the ramifications if you get caught-because chances are, you will. Whether you secretly want to sabotage your relationship or you know that an affair would devastate your partner, you need to ponder how this might play out.
Am I ready for a double life?
If you think you are then it is important for you to know that keeping secrets leads to lots of anxiety. You might just end up feeling stressed out, wishing you had never started this in the first place.
What if things go wrong?
When people feel jilted or betrayed, it brings out the worst in them. And that goes for all three individuals involved in this relationship: you, the other person, and your partner. If the person youre having an affair with becomes obsessed with you, it can become annoying at the very least or dangerous at the very worst.
What do I want to get out of this?
While you might gain affection, attention, and excitement, those things can be fleeting. Keep in mind that what is tempting is not necessarily healthy or permanent. What may be permanent is the loss of your family and your sense of feeling stable and grounded.