Overheard on Earth Day

 

  • Wait, this isn’t Mars?

  • I don’t care what day it is. I want to frack Earth so bad

  • I just love this flat planet

  • This year’s celebration is sponsored by Exxon

  • I’ve become a lot more concerned about the thinning of the ozone layer since I started going bald

  • I can’t wait until Trump puts Earth in its place

  • How come Jupiter never gets a day?

  • Out of respect, I’ll hold off on dumping this toxic waste in the river until tomorrow

  • Drill, baby, drill! What? Wrong event?

  • You had a good run, Earth. I’m gonna miss you