Signs Your Attorney General Has Ties to Russia

 

  • When asked if he’s met with any Russians, he answers “Nyet!”

  • The man absolutely reeks of borscht

  • Refers to Stalin as “Uncle Joe”

  • Always absentmindedly humming the love theme from Dr. Zhivago

  • He’s starting to go shirtless… a lot

  • When watching Rocky IV, always roots for Ivan Drago

  • Occasionally breaks into the saber dance for no apparent reason

  • Keeps rubber sheets on the bed, just in case “the girls” drop by

  • Oddly, has begun referring to co-workers as “You Americans”

  • Is now answering to the name “Yakov Sessions”