Reasons You Should Take Up Golf

A new study claims that playing golf could extend your life. And there are many other benefits. Here are The Top Reasons You Should Take Up Golf.

  • If a creepy clown attacks you, you can defend yourself with a 6-iron.
  • It’s a great time to get together with all your friends and talk like Donald Trump in an “Access Hollywood” bus.
  • Your butt looks fantastic in salmon-colored polyester.
  • You get to bond with nature.  And also a beer cart girl…
  • Arnold Palmer played it and he’s still going strong.  What’s that?  Never mind.
  • You get to dress like a pimp without the headache of collecting money from forgetful crack whores.
  • If you practice really hard, one day you may get eighteen straight holes-in-one, like Kim Jong-Un.
  • You need a sport that’s easier to keep up with than the high-octane pace of baseball.
  • It’s the closest you’ll come to feeling like you’re the President of the United States.
  • Riding in a golf cart is good practice for when you need a scooter because you’re too fat to walk.
  • You can pick up O.J. Simpson’s search for “the real killers.”
  • You love the feeling of constantly failing.
  • It’s fun to cheat with numbers on something other than your taxes.
  • You have a much better chance of seeing your doctor there than you would at his office.
  • Unlike marriage, you have a chance to recover the “balls” you lost.