Things We Learned From The RNC

The Republican National Convention came to a close last night in Cleveland. Let’s do a quick review with The Top Things We Learned From the RNC.

  • Donald Trump doesn’t look any less orange when HE controls the lighting.
  • Calling a guy’s wife ugly and his dad a murderer can have a lasting effect on your relationship with him.
  • This year’s most terrifying Halloween mask? Rudy Giuliani.
  • The GOP has done an effective job programming the “Paul Ryan” android.
  • Having three different families makes you a great family man.
  • Rudy Giuliani can actually make it through an entire speech without mentioning 9/11.
  • Mike Pence is . . . nope, you can’t even finish a sentence about him without dozing off.
  • The only people who are even worse dancers than white people are wealthy white people.
  • Donald Trump has another blonde daughter, but he’s not as into her.
  • Immigrants are the WORST!
  • Donald Trump’s sons didn’t get their looks from their moms.
  • Hillary Clinton is responsible for everything bad that’s ever happened in the world.