Things We’re Learning About Mike Pence

We know Mike Pence is a conservative governor from Indiana, but it turns out there’s a lot more to know about Trump’s running mate. Here are The Top Things We’re Learning About Mike Pence.

  • He’s a proud graduate of Trump University.
  • He originally supported Ted Cruz . . . until Donald Trump pointed out how ugly his wife is.
  • He’s on a national waiting list for a charisma transplant.
  • His popularity in his home state of Indiana has dipped in recent years because of his habit of posting “Game of Thrones” spoilers.
  • He was picked after Trump saw in person that his hands were smaller than his.
  • His go-to song at karaoke is “Chevy Van” by Sammy Johns.
  • He’s about to learn what it’s like to never get a word in edgewise.
  • He was born Michael Richard Pence, but he also answers to “Who?”
  • He has a 4.98 rating as an Uber driver.
  • He recently suffered a massive hernia . . . from pushing Chris Christie aside for the job.
  • He accomplished something impossible by somehow even being boring by Indiana standards.
  • During a guest appearance on Fox News, he too was sexually harassed by Roger Ailes.
  • When he gets his hair done, he asks for “The Newt.”
  • While in New York, he ate at Chili’s . . . or as people in Indiana call it, “ethnic food.”
  • He hosted a radio show in the ’90s. Which means he’s just as qualified to be vice president as I am.