Signs You Have A Bad Hair Stylist

With the new “Barber Shop” movie out this weekend, we thought we’d stay with the hair theme with this list of The Top Signs You Have a Bad Hair Stylist.

  • Every time you walk out of the salon, people call you “Mr. Trump.”
  • Instead of cleaning her combs with that blue liquid, she licks it.
  • She only cuts hair so she can gather all the piles off the floor for her main business of making merkins.
  • She doesn’t talk your ear off . . . but she damn near CUTS it off.
  • He refers to the scissors as “those stabby things.”
  • She expects a tip without making the extra effort to brush her boobs across your cheek.
  • She shrugs and pulls out a yellow Sharpie after you say you want highlights.
  • He puts your trimmings in a baggie, pats it and says, “I’m making a beard for my Barbie.”
  • Her idea of a cutting edge style is “The Rachel.”
  • She was the first result when you Googled “Bad Hair Stylist.”
  • The “hair dryers” are actually microwave ovens on poles.
  • The only equipment she uses is a Flowbee.