Reasons You Love Spring

Spring officially arrived yesterday.  See if your excitement for the Vernal Equinox matches anything found on this list of The Top Reasons You Love Spring.

  • It’s finally time to get outside, head to GameStop, and buy the new “Call of Duty” so you can sit in the basement and play it for the next five months.
  • Who knows?  Some kid hunting Easter Eggs may actually unearth O.J.’s real knife!
  • You can listen to the robins sing their beautiful songs . . . as you scrape their crap off your car.
  • The St. Patrick’s Day swelling in your liver is slowly starting to recede.
  • It’s fun to watch Donald Trump swat at birds trying to use his hair as a nest.
  • All those plants you got sick of taking care of by September are back!
  • You get to break out the weed-whacker . . . for your wife’s legs.
  • It’s the return of baseball, which means you’ll rake in tons of dough with your side job as a steroid dealer.
  • A creepy photo with a mall Easter bunny really brings your family together.