Super Tuesday Facts

 

Today is Super Tuesday.  So let’s take a minute to learn about this big day in presidential politics with this list of The Top Super Tuesday Facts.

  • Donald Trump will be extra orange when he campaigns, to appeal to citrus farmers.
  • It’s made up mostly of southern states.  Which is why it’s always dominated by Larry the Cable Guy.
  • If Ted Cruz doesn’t win his home state of Texas, he’ll make a face even more annoying than his regular one.
  • It’s important enough that Fox News may interrupt its coverage of Hillary’s email to report the results.
  • It looks a lot like Regular Tuesday, except it wears a cape and no glasses.
  • The name Super Tuesday was picked over the other option:  Meh Monday.
  • Bill Clinton calls it “Super Tuesday” because Hillary will be so busy that she won’t have time to keep tabs on him.
  • It’s expected to be another opportunity for Marco Rubio to explain why coming in third place counts as a victory.