The Top Things Punxsutawney Phil is Thinking this Morning.

  • That’s right wood-chuck-chuckers, It’s Groundhogs Day.  Wondering what’s on Phil’s mind before his big moment?  Well, wonder no more.
    • Okay people, get your Bill Murray jokes out of the way.  I got a job to do.
    • Don’t these idiots realize I have no clue how to predict weather?  Sorry.  That’s something Al Roker’s thinking this morning.
    • One day of work, 364 days of Netflix and chill!
    • I wanna nail that thing on Trump’s head.
    • I just did more work this morning than all the Kardashians combined have done this month.
    • This idea that I can predict the coming of spring is actually an offensive stereotype.
    • I can’t believe I already broke my resolution, look how fat my shadow looks.
      I’m a national celebrity and yet I can’t get any help with getting a decent Wi-Fi signal in my underground burrow!
    • I actually identify myself as a prairie dog.